"Basically, the mid-major universe imploded upon itself"...thoughts on Gonzaga and other college basketball non sequiturs

By now everyone's bracket has long been fucked and you're probably pissed off about losing your money in a tournament you knew would go your way because of your advanced college basketball insight. If you're a Washingtonian, you're especially screwed because our state's response to the sadly inconsistent Huskies and forever futile Cougars, the pure, white-hearted (and skinned, mostly) Gonzaga Bulldogs, wet the bed in the second round against Witchita State after promising a good shot at attending the last weekend. So with that in mind, instead of discussing basketball, let's sit down and think about exactly what the loss means, for Gonzaga, for the West Coast, for mid-majors, and for basketball in general.

The Return of the Sonics: A Friendly Reminder to Appreciate the Team

After five excruciatingly long seasons, where we watched the rise, rise, and continued rise of the Oklahoma City Thunder, grudgingly scattered our fandom among the other 29 teams, and even dealt with the demise of top local product Brandon Roy, the Seattle SuperSonics are finally returning for the 2013-14 NBA season, to the immense relief of Washington's basketball faithful. Chris Hansen, aka my hero, purchased the Sacramento Kings for $525 million (time out...525 million. Let that sink in. 525 million! We owe Chris Hansen a gift basket or Macy's gift card, at least). They will spend two or three years playing in the once-deemed NBA unsuitable Key Arena before moving into the under-construction new arena (Check out this sick ass design template here). For all of us buying merchandise, attending rallies, and complaining on Facebook, the reincarnation of the Sonics is a second coming of Adidas proportions, a chance to apologize to and make up with an estranged lover. But herein lies my only concern; a douchebag ex boyfriend might beg for the return of his girlfriend, promising her that this time, things will be different, that he's a changed man, that things weren't so bad in the first place. And, inevitably, when she falls for the smiles and the words ("all the right things"), she takes him back, he takes advantage of her, and she's miserable again.